I Looked Outside and Now I'm a Dad?!

… 

You have a strange feeling to look outside your window.  

…… 

You get out of bed. 

……… 

You look outside. 

. 

. 

. 

The sky was bright blue, birds flying through it. It was nice. Sam smiles a bit, it was nice to get some sun. Sam should probably start his day. He turns around and-

Where. 

Where the HELL was he. 

There was grass beneath his feet, and trees scattered around. Was Sam dreaming? He had to be. Surely the pinch to wake up thing didn't actually work. Ow. Yeah it definitely didn't work. 

“Hello?"

Sam spins around towards the voice. At first he doesn't see it, and then… 

An eye. A bright blue eye embedded within the hole of a tree. 

Cautiously, Sam steps forward. “Was that you?" he asked. 

“Who else?" the eye replies. 

“... Who are you?" 

The eye chuckles somehow. “I'm Sybil,” more eyes sprout within the trees, “You certainly look odd." 

Sam tenses. “I could say the same for you." 

“Rude." she squints at him. “You're not from here, are you? I think…” Sybil pauses, “I don't know why, but I remember something about this.”

“Well I'm definitely not from here.” Sam chuckles nervously. 

“... There's a village not far from here. Go get your bearings there. There… There will be someone who can help. I think… “ Sybil’s voice sounded strained and almost whispery.

“Are you ok?”

“Fine. The village is that way.” Sybil looks right of Sam. "My eyes will appear in the way you must go.”

Sam nods, following the eyes.

Just as he was told, there was a village. Once he walked in, Sybil had disappeared. Maybe she was limited to the trees? Sam shrugs. He still wasn't entirely convinced this wasn't a dream. While walking through, he kept getting looks. It wasn't shocking, considering that he looked much different from anyone else. Pretty much everyone in the village seemed to be wearing things straight out of M&W. Sam stuck out like a sore thumb. 

Ok, even if this was a dream, Sam knew he'd need a place to stay. All he had to do was find a hotel, or inn. Whatever it was called here. Sam glances around, spotting someone incredibly tall in dark blue robes. 

That guy should be able to help, hopefully. Sam walks over to the tall person. 

“Hey, is there a hotel somewhere here?”

The person jolts at Sam’s voice. "Oh! Hello there. Who are you?" 

“Sam. I just need a place to stay the night." 

“I'm Aster. If you’re looking for an inn I do believe the tavern doubles as an inn. Although they charge a ludicrous amount.”

Sam groans. He didn't have shit. “Ok. Great." benches it was.

“I can pay, if you need."

What.

“Im a teacher at a local academy,” Aster explains, “they pay me well, I can spare some gold." 

“You're sure?" 

Aster nods. “In return, you could help me with something. 

And there it was. 

“What is it?”

“My colleagues and I have been searching for artifacts. If you could assist us in locating them it would be greatly appreciated!”

“... Ok?”

“Wonderful! Come, I'll show you to the inn. Tomorrow we can speak on these artifacts.”

And like that, Aster was off with Sam struggling to follow behind.

Aster was… Nice enough. A bit enthusiastic but whatever. Hopefully Sam could get some money out of this. A place to rest his head was already good of course but Sam had been through this before. A strangers kindness could only go so far before it all fell flat. Sam knew that incredibly well. 

He knew he would have to get more money out of Aster, which sucked. Aster was nice and Sam didn't exactly want to swindle him. But you get nowhere without money. Sam sighed, lying in bed.

The inn was nice, at least. Unfortunately the walls were horrifically thin. Sam struggled to fall asleep, hearing every other noise of every other person in the inn. There was a baby crying on one side, and on the other was the sound of a knife being sharpened.

“Sam." 

“GAH-!” Sam nearly fell out of bed. He scrambles back to stability and looks over at Sybil. Sybil had sprouted within the cracks of the walls this time. 

“Nice to see you too. Listen, Sam. I think its very clear you're not from this place. Some sort of different dimension situation I think. So, I figured I could keep an eye on you. Or,” eyes sprout within the other walls. “eyes, I suppose.”

God that was freaky. "Can you do that anywhere?” Sam asks. 

“Pretty much.”

“cool.”

“Well, go get some rest. You have a long day ahead of you tomorrow.”

That is if this isn't a dream, Sam silently adds. He really hoped this was a dream. 

Sam rolls over in the bed, closing his eyes and doing his best to fall asleep. 

—

“Well of course I'd pay you! You are doing a questwork after all. It’d be criminal not to.” Aster laughed over his tea.

it was good to know that Aster would be paying him, Sam really needed that money. Plus this was already infinitely better than minimum wage. Although that wasn't a hard bar to cross. Is minimum wage even a thing here? 

“So… Those artifacts?" 

“Right! Of course, yes, the artifacts. Unfortunately we do not know exactly what they are at this moment. The four of us have each been given a vision of the artifact we need. For myself, I have it written down here," Aster rummages through his bag and grabs a piece of paper, “It was that of this shimmering liquid pouring from a dark tube. While I could not catch the liquid myself, a spider had spun a web that had encaptured the liquid." Aster gives the paper to Sam. “I do hope that a fresh pair of eyes will help to decipher this.”

Sam reads the paper, just the same thing just described to him. He didn't understand it for shit. “I'm not exactly good at puzzle solving." 

“Bah, that is not necessary. I have a feeling that it will come to you in time. For now,” Aster passes Sam some gold, "retrieve yourself some proper adventurers gear.”

Oh right. Clothes. "Thanks, man.”

Sam and Aster said their goodbyes and Sam quickly made his way to the first clothing store he could find. He knew he'd need more clothes anyways so this was a nice headstart. Sam got himself three outfits, making sure to leave gold to spare incase of emergency. Or general spending. He still had no real grasp on the economy here. 

Well, it was whatever. Sam had proper clothes for this place that definitely wasn't a dream at this point. Thank God. Now he just needed to get set up in his inn room. As he folded the clothes into the dresser, he heard clattering and a scream from outside. For some reason, Sam checked it out.

He saw a small scaled man with rows of teeth covering one of his arms. Blood coated some of the teeth, and the blood’s source just barely scrambled down the stairs. Sam stood outside his door, staring at the scene before him until-

The man snapped his gaze to Sam. Shit. As the man charged him, Sam punched him in the jaw(?). The man seemed to stumble back in surprise.

Then, he grins. He attacks again. Sam attacks back. The man attacks. Sam attacks. Again and again until the man falls to the ground. He doesn't get back up.

Sam stands there. Staring at the man. He was… He was alive, right? He had to be. He had to be alive. Surely Sam didn't. He couldn't. 

A baby’s crying echoed from an open door to what Sam assumed was the man’s room. Steeling himself, Sam walked inside. 

Ok. This was definitely horrifying. The inn room had been completely wrecked, there was a massive hole in the floor where the wails of an infant emitted. On the balcony was a scaled woman, she seemed to be crying. Sam walked towards the balcony, but the doorknob seemed to be gone. 

A squeal.

Sam turns towards the noise, there was a child. Sam couldn't discern the age due to the piles of teeth growing on the child. He hesitated to approach, not even sure if the child was alive.

Sam notices a teddy bear on the bed nearby the child. Cautiously, he picks it up and sits beside the child. “Hey bud."

The child makes some sort of movement Sam couldn't describe. They were definitely alive. 

“Is this yours?"

The child glances to Sam, at least he thinks that's what it was.

The child shakes their head. 

“Alright…” Sam notices the child seeming to play with something, “what's that?" 

A gurgle comes from the child, they lift up a wooden toy. 

“That's nice. Is there anyone else here?"

The child nods, a tooth covered limb pointing to the bathroom. 

Sam looks towards the bathroom. “Alright, I'll be right back. Ok?" 

A chirp and a gurgle. 

Sam frowns, hoping the child could see it. He may not be from this place, but this definitely wasn't normal. He just hoped the kid wasn't in any pain.

He gets up, and heads to the bathroom. He knocks on the door. 

“Yeah?" a little boy calls out. 

“Hey, can I come in?" 

“Yep! I'm just brushing my teeth." 

Sam turns the handle, walking into the bathroom. A green scaly child was brushing his teeth, standing on a step stool.

The kid seemed… Alright? Sam couldn't see his face but the kid seemed all there and wasn't struggling to speak. 

“So, who are you?" the boy asked. 

“I'm Sam, an adventurer." technically not a lie.

The boy spits into the sink. “I think I saw you yesterday, you're right next to us right? I'm Joel, by the way.”

“Yeah…” Sam thinks for a moment. “There was someone outside, looked like you but taller. Was that your dad?" 

“Probably. My baby sister is teething and she bit him. She bit me too, now brushing my teeth takes forever!”

That wasn't good. "Are you ok?”

Joel nods. "Yep!! You should see my brother Ben, he got it WAY worse. He almost DIED! but he's ok now.”

Sam frowns. "I think I talked to him earlier. Seems pretty happy.” despite the circumstances at least. 

Joel spits into the sink once more. "Ok, all done!”

He turns around, half of his face was consumed by a gaping hole lined with teeth. "It's taking longer to brush everyday. I lost my eye to it last night… “ the boy trails off, the gaping hole growing into the other side of his face. Sam watches as teeth break through the newly made gums. Sharp, bloody, predator teeth. 

“It's… Hard to… think… Hhh… Fuzzy…” Joel steps forward, claws unsheathed. 

Sam steps backwards, clutching the teddy bear. He hadn't realized he was still holding it. It almost sounded like Joel was calling out for something. 

The bear wasn't Ben’s, maybe it was Joel's. Sam walks towards Joel, and he carefully places the teddy bear in his arms. 

Joel relaxes, clutching his stuffed animal. “You got him…" he approaches Sam, going for a hug. Sam allowed for the hug. Joel was only a kid. A kid in a shitty situation. Sam felt the teeth dig into his skin, but that didn't matter right now.

“Do you know where your mom is?" 

Joel turns to the counter, grabbing something. “balcony, but- hhh- the handle broke off. Here.” Joel gives the handle to Sam. 

“Thanks, bud. How about we go check on your mom together?”

Joel pauses, seemingly considering it for a moment. “Ok.”

Sam smiles softly, unsure if the child could see it. He offers a hand and Joel takes it. Joel could probably still see then. He takes the boy out to the balcony, just hoping Joel’s mom was alright. Joel was ok, so was Ben. Mentally, at least. He prayed to whatever gods this place had that she’d be ok. 

Sam steps out onto the balcony with Joel. Joel’s mom had their back towards them. She seemed to be crying.

“Mom? Are you- hhhh- ok?" Joel asks, tilting his head.

The woman turns around. She seemed alright despite the crying. “Is that my baby…?" her voice was creaky, like an old floorboard almost. “Come here Rosie…"  that wasn't a good sign. 

Sam steps in front of Joel as the woman gets closer. 

“Hey… It doesn't hurt anymore… See…? I know you're just teething… You must be so hungry…” she grasps at her coat. “Come here…" she opens her coat, revealing rows upon rows of teeth. 

FUCK THAT.

Sam grasps Joel’s hand and immediately runs back into the Inn’s room. He hastily locks the door to the balcony, Sam did NOT want that woman to follow.

Sam turns back to Joel. What does he even say to the kid? He couldn't just say that ‘oh your family is insane now oh well.’

This sucked. 

“... Joel? You ok? “

“... Yeah.” the boy was quiet. 

Neither of them spoke for a while, until Ben made a squealing noise. Thank God for the distraction.

Sam gestures for Joel to follow as he sits beside Ben.

Ben perks up upon noticing Joel, gurgling. 

The brothers seem to talk, well Joel does at least. It was nice to see.

Sam knew he couldn’t let the boys stay here. He definitely didn't trust their mom and their dad was dead and who's fault was that?.  He wasn't even sure if Ben could get up. Could he leave Ben here until he got help? Surely their mom wouldn't attack her own son. Hopefully.

“I need to get help.” Sam says finally. “a doctor to help you guys, preferably.”

“What?”

Shit were doctors called something else here?

“This can't be- hhhh- cured.” Joel said.

“What? What do you mean it can't be cured.”

“My mom- hhh- says that sometimes kobolds- hhh- grow teeth wrong and- hhhh- there's nothing– hhhh- to do. “

Sam sighs. Why would it be that easy? "Well I'm sure you can at least help minimize it. Ben do you think you can walk, bud?”

Ben shakes his head.

“Alright…” Sam thinks for a moment. The balcony was locked… Ben would be fine until he could get help. “Joel? Do you want to help me get some help?”

Joel nods. "Yeah! It’ll be an- hhhh- adventure!”

Immediately the boy is up, Sam following behind. In all honesty Sam just hoped to God Aster was nearby because he didn't know who was what in this village. Instead he kept passing by more and more people he didn't know, even bumping into a spider-esque person. Eventually he manages to find an adventurers guild. Hopefully someone there could help. 

Sam walks to the front desk. The woman there, an orc(?) with a mask, takes a single glance at Joel and speaks. “Kobold overgrowth?"

Joel nods.

Suddenly, a hatchet swings by Sam's head and towards a group of three adventurers. “Kobold overgrowth at the inn. Go handle it. 200 gold each." 

There was some complaining from the three before the woman holds up ANOTHER(???) hatchet and they're off. 

“Thank you- hhh- ma’am.” Joel probably smiled there. 

The woman nods.

…. 

Ok yeah probably not much else to say there.

“Is the child yours?"

Sam jolts in surprise. "Uh- no? He has his mom. Who's overgrown, that's the term right?”

The woman stares at him. "His mother is overgrown.”

“Yeah?”

“You do not recover from overgrowth.”

Sam frowns. 

“You are this child’s caregiver now.”

“Isn't there a system for this, I mean-”

“Yes. You saved a child, now you raise him.”

Well shit. 

Sam stayed in the village until he got word about Ben's status. He wanted to make sure the kid would be safe. As a result, he visited the adventurers guild enough times to become mildly acquainted with the guildkeep, Hellen. She at least humored his worry. Ben for the most part, was fine. They got him set up in the adventurers guild to play army with his toys. Occasionally Joel could drag Sam into it as well. It was nice.

But if Sam knew anything about adventuring it's that he would need to get going. Figure out what the hell Aster was even looking for and… 

And Joel… 

Fuck what was he gonna do about Joel? Hellen said that he was meant to take care of the kid now but surely that wasn't how things actually worked here. He couldn't just take this kid away from a safe place like this. He couldn't take Joel away from his brother. Could he? 

“Sam."

“Oh," Sam sits up from bed. “Hey Sybil. What's up?”

“When are you planning on leaving the village?”

“Ugh. Don't remind me that I have to do that.” Sam groaned. "I haven't even figured out what to do with Joel.”

“... You take him with you." Sybil sounded like she was saying something everyone knew. 

“I am not taking an eight year old away from his brother.”

“Sam-” Sybil sighs. "Sam you found the kid, you helped the kid, now you have to raise him. That's how it works.”

“That cannot be true." 

“It is. There's a law about it. If an adventurer ends up taking care of a child for a period of more than two days, then the adventurer will be considered the primary care giver." 

“... Why do you have that memorized." 

“You have to know the law to know how to bend it." 

Sam couldn't argue there. “How do I even tell him this?”

“He knows.”

Sam looks at Sybil. “What do you mean he knows.”

“The law was made for a reason, you'd be shocked how common it is. Plus I've overheard Joel and Ben talking.”

“... He's ok with it?”

“Eh.” Sam could sense the shrug, even if Sybil had no body. "As ok as a kid who’s getting adopted can be.”

“Guess I'll have to pack up even more stuff for him now.”

“Have fun with that.”

Sam rolls his eyes, turning back into bed. As he drifted away he felt something brush across his cheek. Probably one of the bugs.

The next morning Sybil was incredibly pushy in getting Sam out of the village for whatever reason. He and Joel did both get out by the afternoon, however. Sam probably should've proded Sybil on why she was so insistent but it is what it is.

it wasn't Sam’s first time sleeping outside, but it was his first time sleeping in a forest. He'd never even gone camping before and now he was setting up a tent. For the first time in his life. At the age of 31. First time setting a tent. 

“Joel, can you hold this down for me?”

The boy goes to the pole, holding it down. Sam carefully follows the pole to its opposite point, making sure it doesn't spring out. And… Done. Sam sighs in relief. Poles down.

Almost instantly, Joel was inside the tent. Sam hadn't even gotten his sleeping bag set up in there yet. He gets the sleeping bags and gets into the tent as well.

Sam has them set up on opposite sides of the tent, trying to make sure Joel had his own space. He would've gotten Joel his own tent but since it was the forest Sam figured a single tent was safer. 

“... Joel?"

Joel already in his sleeping bag, although he seemed to be shaking. Sam sits beside Joel. 

“Are you alright?" 

Joel lets out a muffled “no." 

Sam sighs. “Yeah I figured. Listen, I already talked to Sybil about it and since she can be anywhere she thought that when you and Ben wanted to talk, she could carry the message along." 

The kobold glances up, then looks back down.

“And I know you’ll need a lot of time to process everything that happened, but I want you to know that you can talk to me about it.”

“... Ok.”

That's… Probably as far as Sam would be able to get. It sucked but it wasn't like he could push Joel to open up. That came at it's own time. Sam knew he shouldn't force it.

For a while, they just sat there in the tent. It was dark anyways so it wasn't exactly a good idea to go out. Sam heard howling, clicking noises, the leaves rattling… 

… 

He glances to Joel, who was now asleep, clinging to his bear. Hopefully the things nearby would skitter away.

Click, click, click.

It was getting closer. Sam stared at the tent’s entrance. He grabbed a dagger he'd gotten while getting supplies, readying it for whatever could try to come through.

Right in front of the tent came a low growling noise. Then a bark from further away. Multiple barks. Wolves? Sam wasn't sure and he didn't want to find find out.

The clicking noise, footsteps maybe, grew quieter yet quicker. Sam heard a yelp from one of the wolves. The clicking thing was attacking the wolves.

Another yelp, this one was more human. Was someone getting hurt? Sam gets closer to the tent's entrance. The wolves yipped at something, and Sam could hear them retreat. Cautiously, Sam opens the tent. 

Yet nothing was there besides traces of blood and clumps of grey fur in the summer night. 

Something was following them. They were a quarter way to the next town when Sam first noticed him. A cloaked man, hiding behind the trees. Staring at Sam. At first, Sam just picked up the pace. Then Sybil told him that the guy had been following them since the village. 

He'd been following them for that long and hasn't laid a single finger on them. Maybe he didn't have bad intentions. Maybe…

No. Sam couldn't be stupid. He needed to keep Joel safe first and foremost, and that meant NOT approaching a stalker.

Sam opened the tent, getting ready to get back into the road only to see a plate of rations in front of the tent. Near the food was a trail of trampled grass, something rushing away most likely. Sam shrugs, putting the food into his own rations. He didn't want Joel to have them. Just in case.

A gentle and quiet giggle emitted from the trees. So that guy left the food. That was nice.

“Thank you." Sam calls out, and near immediately he hears something shuffle away.

Was the guy nervous? Maybe.

Eh, didn't matter. Sam was grateful for the extra food. They had to get on the road anyways.

Sam got Joel ready and they were back to heading to the next village.

He still needed to figure out what Aster was looking for. The dream obviously meant something, this was a fantasy world after all, but it was just weird. A spider catching shimmering liquid from a tube. What could that even begin to mean?

“Hey Joel, do you like riddles?"

The kobold lights up. “Yep! I- hhh- love riddles. What's black, white and read all over?”

Sam smiles. "A newspaper?”

“Yeah!!”

“well, Aster had a dream and it's kinda like a riddle. Think you could take a crack at it?"

Joel nods, his tail wagging. 

“Aster saw a black shimmering liquid coming from a tube, he tried to capture it but couldn't. Only a spider’s web did." Sam explained. 

The boy falls silent, thinking. "What if- hhh- its about that guy thats been- hhh- following us?”

… “You've noticed him too then?”

Joel nods. "He's being- hhhh- weird. I hhh- don't get why he doesn't just- hhhh- talk to us to join? 

“Do you want me to go talk to him?"

“If you could.”

Sam nods. "Alright.” he looks around, trying to spot the guy.

There he was. Staring at him from between the trees. The guy seemed to shrink back the moment Sam spotted him. Alright.

Sam sighs, walking over. “Hey man, I don't really care that you're following us but Joel thinks it's weird that you haven't just asked to travel with us. Do you want to just come with us?”

The man, who Sam could now see was exceptionally tall with six legs (?), shrinks back. "I-I uhm. Y-youre o-ok with tha-that?”

Sam shrugs. “You haven't hurt us yet." 

“Th-thats not a go-good measure."

“Probably not. I'm Sam, but I doubt you don't know that." 

“... Lyle." 

“Nice name."

Lyle’s face flushes. “S-so you're r-Really ok with m-me co-coming with?" 

“Why not?" 

Lyle smiles wide. “O-OK! y-yeah! I'll co-come with." cute

Sam heads back to Joel, gesturing for Lyle to follow.

Lyle followed REALLY close behind Sam. Maybe Sam should've been off put by it but it was almost flattering. In a way. He could feel the guy staring so intently. Sam had never gotten that kind of attention before. He knew he should be comfortable but he just couldn't bring himself to be. Maybe he should unpack that but now wasn't the time. Besides, they were a quarter out to the next village. Then they could find one of Aster’s colleagues. Sam couldn't even remember the name of the guy.

It was colder tonight. Sam didn't really know what Lyle was but he seemed to resemble a spider. Spiders didn't handle the cold well, Sam knew that much. So he found himself collecting sticks for a campfire while Lyle set up the tent. Obviously there wasn't a tent for Lyle just yet and Sam didn't want the guy to go cold. So a fire it was.

Thankfully, he hadn't lost that muscle memory from back when he was younger and the fire was up in moments. “Hey Lyle?" 

In an instant, Lyle was by Sam’s side. How did he move that fast? “Y-yeah?”

“Since I don't have a tent for you I figured you could sleep by the fire? Since spiders don't do well in the cold."

“O-oh! Tha-thank you." he smiles at Sam. “I-I’ll keep wa-watch for the n-night.”

Sam nods. “Just make sure to get some rest too. Once we get you a tent we can take shifts."

“R-Right.”

Eventually, Sam retreated to bed. He hoped the fire would be ok for now. Lyle seemed ok with it but Sam could tell that he wasn't the kind of guy to say if something wasn't ok. Sam knew because he unfortunately used to be that guy. Maybe he still was, letting in a complete stranger that had been following him and Joel for who knows how long. Yet Sam knew Lyle wasn't any threat, he couldn't explain why, he just knew.

Sam wondered why Joel thought Lyle could relate to the artifact, sure he was a spider (or drider, apparently) but Sam didn't even know if the guy could spin webs. 

He was probably thinking about it too literally. It was a weird dream a weird guy got in a fantasy world. It wasn't going to be a literal web.

Probably.

Sam didn't know anymore.